very Sensitive habitancy and "Being Psychic" - Hsp Not Esp-Reading Non-Verbal Signals

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High sensitivity is essentially a naturally occurring tendency for the brain to process incoming stimuli in more detail. It occurs in 15-20% of the population of all higher animals together with human beings. This extra processing takes more time and means that an Hsp will sometimes be more busy and even over-stimulated when trying to assimilate the meaning of high speed, complex and shifting social or environmental information. At the same time, processing in greater detail permits the capture of subtleties and nuances that others might pass over or caress only minimally.

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Several of the questions in Elaine Aron's Hsp Self-test aim specifically to compare the ability of inter-personal sensitivity in the test taker.
"When population are uncomfortable in a corporal environment I tend to know what needs to be done to make it more comfortable (like changing the lighting or the seating)" "Other people's moods sway me."

Hsp's ordinarily score high on these items. This is primary because other human beings, their actions, and expressions of emotion are processed with the same depth of detail and attentiveness to nuance that characterizes all Hsp processing

Emotion researchers forewarn us that up to 90% of all emotional transportation is done non-verbally.
Human beings chronicle their feelings, not just with words, but through tone of voice, volume, speed of speech, turn-taking, pattern of eye contact, facial expression, body posture, hand gestures, changes in color (such as blushing or paling), and more subtly still by physiological changes in breathing or heart rate which may be perceptible to a highly attuned observer (Schore, 2005).

Ability to read and rejoinder to these indicators is already developed when we are pre-verbal infants. attentiveness to speech at last takes priority in our interpersonal exchanges and the basal ability to read non-verbal signals becomes largely unconscious and self-acting even though it continues to underpin and progress our insight of what our conversational partner intends.

These non-verbal signals constitute a sort of emotional language that we emit and by comparison in parallel to our speech and we rejoinder emotionally with feelings of wariness and anxiety, or relax and security, depending on what is being signaled.

Highly sensitive individuals are also highly sensitive to this play of emotional signal and response, but like the rest of us, they may be unaware of the degree to which they are reading and responding to their partner's non-verbal communications.

Many Hsp's wonder if they are "psychic"?
They know that they get "feelings" about places, things and especially people. Human nature being what it is, pleasant feelings of acceptance, warmth or interest are not worrisome, but Hsp's, with their attentiveness to detail unconsciously notice mixed signals, or signals which could suggest anger, disapproval or rejection. Anxiety produces corporal sensations in the body such as increased heart rate, constricted breathing and the issue of chemicals that prepare us for fight or flight. Hsp's are more subtle readers of their own corporal responses as well and these unpleasant sensations may not pass unnoticed. They may any way be misinterpreted as "negative vibes" and presumed to be emanating from their conversational partner rather than originating in themselves.

This misreading becomes problematic if Hsp's act on their feelings by withdrawing, avoiding or by responding with irritation, anger or hurt which may not appear justified by the outside change in the middle of the two.

It is useful therefore, for Hsp's who do get "feelings" about population to take a occasion to query their assumptions.
People typically try to modulate the feelings that they show on the outside so that they are in holding with the demands of the situation. But this means that population often feel more than they show. Hsp's with their extra awareness of nuance in transportation often pick up on this depth or combination of contradictory feelings in others but they make the mistake of presuming that it is directed at them often in a negative way which is authentically unwarranted.

An imaginary example might be a situation where a friend is required to say something mildly primary to an Hsp acquaintance. The friend approaches the change with mild anxiety and perhaps even some resentment towards a third party who has insisted that this be done... So that mixed emotional signaling underpins the exchange. The highly observant Hsp may misread this as inexpressive aggression or anger and rejoinder more strongly than the situation appears to query on the surface. This is because the Hsp, in the occasion of perceiving the unpleasantness, feels rising in themselves their own history of being criticized, rejected and hurt in the past and they rejoinder as if there is imminent danger of re-occurrence. Their strong reaction is in turn confusing and upsetting to their partner... And the situation intensifies problematically for both parties as the Hsp hooks their partner's ordinary tension up to their own personal fears and negative expectations.
Reality check
How can this be prevented?

In a word, "Ask!"

Hsp sensitivity and attunement to others is a gift but it should not all the time be permitted to remain at the level of "feelings". An Hsp faced with mixed or confused emotional signals from their partner may have to address the caress consciously and rationally. Often the use of a simple, open query will permit clarification and defuse the tension.

Examples:
"I get the feeling that there is something about this that bothers you?" "I wonder if there is more you would like to say about this..." "I feel as if you are feeling a bit upset about this ...(without specifying a inherent cause)" "You seem to be of two minds about this."
Hsp's are uniquely situated.
Human beings live in a social world in which we are constantly attempting to chronicle or ideas and feelings not only through words but also through gestures and glances. Hsp's are sensitive readers of these signals and with a exiguous conscious awareness they are uniquely situated to translate this nuanced insight into better, deeper, relationships with those around them.

References:
A.N. Schore (2005). A Neuropsychoanalytic Point of View, Psychoanalytic Dialogues, 15(6), p.829-854.
E. Aron, highly Sensitive person Self-Test, Copyright, 1996. Http://www.hsperson.com/pages/test.htm

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